I had one situation where I was signing students up for their fall classes and two of those students were best friends, who wanted to sign up for the same classes, so that they could kick it together, you know. Well, one of the students did not test well, so this student could only take two classes, while the best friend had the option of taking a variety of classes. Now, in my mind, I'm thinking that the friend who could take whatever, would do just that, but in an effort to make the other friend happy, this student limited the amount classes they would take in order to be with the best friend. As an educator, I was completely shocked and I did everything possible to try and get this student to reconsider, but nothing worked and they still have the same schedules.
I wanted the student to understand that sometimes you can't help another person get on your level, but that doesn't mean you have to get on their level, let them worry about their academics and you worry about yours. I asked the student this question, "If you were accepted into Yale and your friend was accepted to the local community college, would you stay behind to make that friend feel better about their academic situation or would you go on and handle your business?" The student's eyes grew wide and I could tell they understood where I was coming from.
Students, just because your friend can't take AP Chemistry with you doesn't mean that you shouldn't take it. It doesn't make you less of a friend because you're on another academic level than your friend is and if they truly are your friend, they wouldn't care that you're in honors and they're not.
Tuesday, June 28, 2016
Monday, May 30, 2016
Too Much Parent Pressure
This weekend I read an article about a young lady who was a high achiever at her boarding school in California. After graduating high school she enrolled at Columbia University and she became overwhelmed with the expectations of others thrust upon her, so after a couple semesters at school, she decided to quit and start all over again. The young lady stated that she was no longer inspired, therefore she took matters into her own hands and decided to live the life she wanted.
I'm sure you've heard of the phrase "Peer Pressure", where people your age pressure you to do things that you normally wouldn't do; it's not always dangerous, but it's almost never a good idea. Pressure to do things that we normally wouldn't do doesn't always come from our peers, for students who are considered high achievers, their pressure comes from their parents. Additionally, there are some students who fall into the average category, but their parents seem to think that the student can do more, therefore they push those students to the limit, not realizing the negative effect it's having on the student.
I often deal with parents who put extreme pressure on their high school students, not really focused on what the student wants or what the student thinks they can do, instead, it's almost like the parent is trying live through the student. As I interact with these types of parents my focus instantly goes to the student who is visibly and sometimes audibly upset that their parents are making them do extra work on top of the work they already have to do at the high school. On the one hand, I understand that the parents want their child to be successful, I applaud the efforts that these parents are making by being involved in the child's academics. On the other hand, parents have to listen to that child, especially if the student is saying that they can't live up to your expectations.
There is a balance that needs to be paid close attention to. If you push a student too hard while they are still in high school, once they graduate they may fall off the grid and live a life that is carefree. However, if you don't push a student enough, they may feel like being mediocre is OK, when really mediocrity can only get them so far in life. It all goes back to paying attention to the student. If a student has performed as an average student, doing just enough to get by, push them a little, but don't make them feel overwhelmed. Also, if you've allowed the student to perform at the average level in the beginning, don't expect much change from them in the end, unless the student is ready for change.
Parents, if you're going to push a student to perform at the highest level, make sure you start them early (i.e. elementary school); waiting until they reach high school to push them is setting yourself up for some resistance. Be sure to pay attention to what they're good at; if the student can excel in one area, push that area and introduce areas that need improvement along the way.
The key thing to remember here is that too much pressure from parents can cause students to explode once they break free from your grip.
I'm sure you've heard of the phrase "Peer Pressure", where people your age pressure you to do things that you normally wouldn't do; it's not always dangerous, but it's almost never a good idea. Pressure to do things that we normally wouldn't do doesn't always come from our peers, for students who are considered high achievers, their pressure comes from their parents. Additionally, there are some students who fall into the average category, but their parents seem to think that the student can do more, therefore they push those students to the limit, not realizing the negative effect it's having on the student.
I often deal with parents who put extreme pressure on their high school students, not really focused on what the student wants or what the student thinks they can do, instead, it's almost like the parent is trying live through the student. As I interact with these types of parents my focus instantly goes to the student who is visibly and sometimes audibly upset that their parents are making them do extra work on top of the work they already have to do at the high school. On the one hand, I understand that the parents want their child to be successful, I applaud the efforts that these parents are making by being involved in the child's academics. On the other hand, parents have to listen to that child, especially if the student is saying that they can't live up to your expectations.
There is a balance that needs to be paid close attention to. If you push a student too hard while they are still in high school, once they graduate they may fall off the grid and live a life that is carefree. However, if you don't push a student enough, they may feel like being mediocre is OK, when really mediocrity can only get them so far in life. It all goes back to paying attention to the student. If a student has performed as an average student, doing just enough to get by, push them a little, but don't make them feel overwhelmed. Also, if you've allowed the student to perform at the average level in the beginning, don't expect much change from them in the end, unless the student is ready for change.
Parents, if you're going to push a student to perform at the highest level, make sure you start them early (i.e. elementary school); waiting until they reach high school to push them is setting yourself up for some resistance. Be sure to pay attention to what they're good at; if the student can excel in one area, push that area and introduce areas that need improvement along the way.
The key thing to remember here is that too much pressure from parents can cause students to explode once they break free from your grip.
Thursday, May 26, 2016
Teachers: You Are the ADULT
This is a public service announcement: Teachers STOP trying to pacify a student's every need.
I REPEAT: Teachers STOP IT.
Parents are doing it enough these days, giving their children everything they want and when the child can't have their way, they throw a tantrum.
Note to parents and teachers: Ms. Griffin will not tolerate that behavior.
Don't be afraid of students, their children, although the food today makes them grow at extremely alarming rates, they are still children and I will treat them as such.
What ever happened to students being told what to do and they did it?
I had a teacher named Ms. Lois Jones, when I came to class, that room belonged to her, not me or my classmates or my mama - it belonged to Ms. Jones. That's it, that's all.
Now-a-days, students run the show, at school and at home (say what?!), yes, it's either the student's way or the highway.
I was brought up in the old school, which means I like things done the old way. Students will RESPECK me, in fact I demand it. If I say no, after I've explained the situation, that's the end of the conversation - NEXT! If I say no and the student decides to go find somebody else to help their cause, they wasted their time and that person's time. A lot of new school teachers don't think this way and for the ones who do THANK YOU from the bottom of my heart.
Students need to understand how the "real world" works and the only place in the real world where you can have things your way is McDonald's *insert side eye*. I wish I might have tried to go over my military supervisor's head after he told me no, I would have found myself in the office of the commander watching him type my Letter of Counseling (LOC) (it's not good).
Students have this sense of entitlement, they have to have things their way, but if we allow them to keep this way of thinking they're going to go out into the world and get slapped in the face with some reality.
I REPEAT: Teachers STOP IT.
Parents are doing it enough these days, giving their children everything they want and when the child can't have their way, they throw a tantrum.
Note to parents and teachers: Ms. Griffin will not tolerate that behavior.
Don't be afraid of students, their children, although the food today makes them grow at extremely alarming rates, they are still children and I will treat them as such.
What ever happened to students being told what to do and they did it?
I had a teacher named Ms. Lois Jones, when I came to class, that room belonged to her, not me or my classmates or my mama - it belonged to Ms. Jones. That's it, that's all.
Now-a-days, students run the show, at school and at home (say what?!), yes, it's either the student's way or the highway.
I was brought up in the old school, which means I like things done the old way. Students will RESPECK me, in fact I demand it. If I say no, after I've explained the situation, that's the end of the conversation - NEXT! If I say no and the student decides to go find somebody else to help their cause, they wasted their time and that person's time. A lot of new school teachers don't think this way and for the ones who do THANK YOU from the bottom of my heart.
Students need to understand how the "real world" works and the only place in the real world where you can have things your way is McDonald's *insert side eye*. I wish I might have tried to go over my military supervisor's head after he told me no, I would have found myself in the office of the commander watching him type my Letter of Counseling (LOC) (it's not good).
Students have this sense of entitlement, they have to have things their way, but if we allow them to keep this way of thinking they're going to go out into the world and get slapped in the face with some reality.
Monday, May 23, 2016
There's No Excuse
I held an event about a month ago for parents of students who are eligible to take classes at the community college while simultaneously taking high school classes aka dual enrollment. Well, I would think that if I'm offering something free and that will benefit the future of your child, then anyone would show up right? Wrong, out of a possible 70 families that were invited to attend, only about 15 showed up. I was shocked! Here I am offering free college to students and families, but only a few showed up, but the show must go on and it did. I was immediately able to tell that the families who showed up were very serious about their child taking advantage of this wonderful opportunity. Now to be fair, the evening of the event it rained cats and dogs, but the rain ended an hour or so before my presentation took place and I waited for another 5 minutes after the advertised start time, just to give families a chance to come in, but the ones who were coming were already seated and patiently waiting for me to begin.
There is no excuse when it comes to planning for the future of your child. NONE. ZERO. ZILCH. My father didn't learn how to drive until I was in the 5th grade, at which point he bought a car (paid cash), and begin transporting my sister and I wherever we needed to go. However, before he had a car, he used his ability to walk and ride his bicycle to get from point A to point B; that included going to work, going out to eat, and leaving work to come check on myself due to any behavior issues that I might experience at school. My dad would ride his bicycle in the rain, in the humid, hot South Georgia summer, and in the cold; there was no where that he couldn't go, especially if it was pertaining to my sister and me. The car he purchased in 1997 was old and it often didn't work, so we would have to resort back to walking or doubling up on his bicycle (one of us on the handle bars and one on the seat with dad), but we made it work and there was never an acceptable excuse for why things couldn't or didn't get accomplished.
So what's your excuse?
If it's about your child, plan for their future, regardless of what you have going on, make every effort to support your child. Yes, there were times when my father couldn't leave work or my mother couldn't make it to an event, but they made arrangements for someone to show up in their place and relay the information back to them. In fact, because teachers were so awesome, they would come to events and report them back to parents, because they cared.
There's no excuse. As my husband would say, "Are you going to BBQ or mildew?".
There is no excuse when it comes to planning for the future of your child. NONE. ZERO. ZILCH. My father didn't learn how to drive until I was in the 5th grade, at which point he bought a car (paid cash), and begin transporting my sister and I wherever we needed to go. However, before he had a car, he used his ability to walk and ride his bicycle to get from point A to point B; that included going to work, going out to eat, and leaving work to come check on myself due to any behavior issues that I might experience at school. My dad would ride his bicycle in the rain, in the humid, hot South Georgia summer, and in the cold; there was no where that he couldn't go, especially if it was pertaining to my sister and me. The car he purchased in 1997 was old and it often didn't work, so we would have to resort back to walking or doubling up on his bicycle (one of us on the handle bars and one on the seat with dad), but we made it work and there was never an acceptable excuse for why things couldn't or didn't get accomplished.
So what's your excuse?
If it's about your child, plan for their future, regardless of what you have going on, make every effort to support your child. Yes, there were times when my father couldn't leave work or my mother couldn't make it to an event, but they made arrangements for someone to show up in their place and relay the information back to them. In fact, because teachers were so awesome, they would come to events and report them back to parents, because they cared.
There's no excuse. As my husband would say, "Are you going to BBQ or mildew?".
Thursday, May 19, 2016
No Students in the Library (Media Center)
What happened to the media center being filled with students doing research projects?
I work at two high schools, twice a week and every week I pass by the media center and there are no, ZERO, students in there reading or even touching a book, although there are several books to choose from.
What happened to the days of the teacher giving her students a project or a book report and making them spend the entire period in the library, researching the material they will use for that project? I understand that everything is online now, but why have a library if you aren't going make the students utilize it or allow them to utilize it. The media center has become somewhat of a dead zone for students, nothing goes on here, so they stay away.
Someone could argue that students can find what they need online, but are students really reading anything anyway? Whether it be online or in a book, I find that students aren't taking the time to read anything, so maybe we need to make them READ.
Reading is fundamental. Reading something could be the difference of you gaining something or signing your life away. I can't completely harp on the students, parents aren't reading either, what is going on with the world?! I remember my teachers making us read, and re-read a paragraph until we could fully understand and explain what we had read; that doesn't seem to be happening anymore. Everything is geared towards preparing students for a test, yet test scores don't seem to be increasing.
My solution is that we get students from in front of the computer screen and into the library. Make them grab a book and put down their cell phones. Have them read about whatever they choose or pick something for the subject you teach and have them report on what they read. Make their brains actually do some work.
Put the library to use or else, cut the costs and put the money elsewhere.
I work at two high schools, twice a week and every week I pass by the media center and there are no, ZERO, students in there reading or even touching a book, although there are several books to choose from.
What happened to the days of the teacher giving her students a project or a book report and making them spend the entire period in the library, researching the material they will use for that project? I understand that everything is online now, but why have a library if you aren't going make the students utilize it or allow them to utilize it. The media center has become somewhat of a dead zone for students, nothing goes on here, so they stay away.
Someone could argue that students can find what they need online, but are students really reading anything anyway? Whether it be online or in a book, I find that students aren't taking the time to read anything, so maybe we need to make them READ.
Reading is fundamental. Reading something could be the difference of you gaining something or signing your life away. I can't completely harp on the students, parents aren't reading either, what is going on with the world?! I remember my teachers making us read, and re-read a paragraph until we could fully understand and explain what we had read; that doesn't seem to be happening anymore. Everything is geared towards preparing students for a test, yet test scores don't seem to be increasing.
My solution is that we get students from in front of the computer screen and into the library. Make them grab a book and put down their cell phones. Have them read about whatever they choose or pick something for the subject you teach and have them report on what they read. Make their brains actually do some work.
Put the library to use or else, cut the costs and put the money elsewhere.
Wednesday, May 18, 2016
Are The Adults Paying Attention?
I have a very serious question, "Are the adults paying attention to what's going on in the child's education?".
I send emails quite often, in fact, if you can't reach me in my office, you can always reach me by email and I'm usually quick about responding except for when the answer you require also requires some research. I also send letters home in the mail, very detailed letters explaining why I'm writing and how it will be beneficial to the student of that household, but no one really pays attention. Here I am, offering a FREE........F-R-E-E college education to students in a low income situation and no one is paying attention. The students are paying attention, but their attention span is limited, they have other things to be concerned with, rightfully so because they're children, but what about the adults?
The only time people seem to pay attention is when something is wrong and isn't that sad? Or, they pay attention when they realize that the student isn't getting what another student is getting. Or, they just don't have enough time to pay attention because they have other things to worry about, but isn't the FREE college education of your child important enough?
Now, don't get me wrong, I have a handful of parents who really, and I mean REALLY care about their child's education. There are also a handful of teachers who genuinely care about the students they serve (Yes, teachers, your job is to serve your students education - you are in a public service position), but the majority of adults are NOT paying attention and because they aren't paying attention, students miss out.
I need adults to read the emails that are sent to them concerning their students, their children. I need adults to listen to everything that I tell them about FREE college! I need adults to read the program material so that they can understand what their student is signing up for. I need adults to read and listen to everything I have to say that they can ask QUESTIONS NOW, not after it's too late.
Ultimately, I need adults to care enough to want to make a difference in the lives of their students, their children, because it really does take a village.
I send emails quite often, in fact, if you can't reach me in my office, you can always reach me by email and I'm usually quick about responding except for when the answer you require also requires some research. I also send letters home in the mail, very detailed letters explaining why I'm writing and how it will be beneficial to the student of that household, but no one really pays attention. Here I am, offering a FREE........F-R-E-E college education to students in a low income situation and no one is paying attention. The students are paying attention, but their attention span is limited, they have other things to be concerned with, rightfully so because they're children, but what about the adults?
The only time people seem to pay attention is when something is wrong and isn't that sad? Or, they pay attention when they realize that the student isn't getting what another student is getting. Or, they just don't have enough time to pay attention because they have other things to worry about, but isn't the FREE college education of your child important enough?
Now, don't get me wrong, I have a handful of parents who really, and I mean REALLY care about their child's education. There are also a handful of teachers who genuinely care about the students they serve (Yes, teachers, your job is to serve your students education - you are in a public service position), but the majority of adults are NOT paying attention and because they aren't paying attention, students miss out.
I need adults to read the emails that are sent to them concerning their students, their children. I need adults to listen to everything that I tell them about FREE college! I need adults to read the program material so that they can understand what their student is signing up for. I need adults to read and listen to everything I have to say that they can ask QUESTIONS NOW, not after it's too late.
Ultimately, I need adults to care enough to want to make a difference in the lives of their students, their children, because it really does take a village.
Saturday, May 14, 2016
Limited Expectations
"I can already tell what they're going to be", said one of the school employees. I said, "Really, how?". She said, "I just can. You can just look at them and tell". I was shocked.
Teachers and school staff have so much power, so much influence over the next generation, but instead of being a solution to the problem they talk down to the students and only lend a helping hand to those whose family they know or whose parents make the most fuss; everyone else just falls to the wayside.
I remember being in the 9th and 10th grade, at a high school in South Georgia, and not really understanding or caring about what was going on with my education. I took the classes that the school told me I should take, without question, unless it was a class that I thought was going to be terribly hard, like biology. Don't get me wrong, I had some great influences, but during school hours educational motivation was almost non-existent from the school faculty and staff; I can count on one hand how many teachers showed that they actually cared about my academic present and future.
What happened to public educators expecting the best out of their students? When did pushing students, no matter what their socio-economic background was, go out the window? I literally see teachers chilling in their classrooms on their cell phones and guess what the students are doing? The students are doing the same thing. We could blame it on age, but I know a lot of young teachers who are trying to instill in students what was instilled in them. We could also try to blame it on things like "No Child Left Behind" (which I despise), but like I see some teachers working around the ridiculousness of NCLB. So who do we blame for limited expectations?
Parents - Yes, I'm blaming parents!!!!!! Parents should be the first people to express to their children the type of expectations that they have for their academic progress or lack there of. Parents should also make an EFFORT to get out to their children's school at least once a month, to meet with teachers and see what's really going on with their child's education.
Teachers/School Administration/School Boards - Yes, they get blamed too. Yes, education is a job, it is a means for providing a living for some, but you also have precious futures in your hands, futures that you have the ability to help mold. Why wouldn't you want to go above and beyond to help positively shape one of your student's futures? Yes, you work long hours (who doesn't). Yes, you have a family at home (again, who doesn't). Yes, the state and federal government require a lot out of you (you signed up for this). I believe if you're in education ( like myself), you should bend over backward making sure students get the best education and experience that you have to offer.
Students - Yes, I blame the students too. Stop making excuses. You can see what's right and what's wrong within the walls of your school. You see the "smart" kids getting their work done, getting awards, and you want the same feeling, but instead of asking how they do it, you want to tease them or ignore them - THAT'S NOT COOL. Ask for help, and if you're shy, ask for help after your friends have left. Get rid of some of those so called friends, you know what they're up too isn't going to help your future. I came from a home where my mother didn't make it to high school, so I had to choose: Be like those around me in my neighborhood or be like those who seemed to be going places? I mean I have a Master's Degree now, so what do you think I did?
Teachers and school staff have so much power, so much influence over the next generation, but instead of being a solution to the problem they talk down to the students and only lend a helping hand to those whose family they know or whose parents make the most fuss; everyone else just falls to the wayside.
I remember being in the 9th and 10th grade, at a high school in South Georgia, and not really understanding or caring about what was going on with my education. I took the classes that the school told me I should take, without question, unless it was a class that I thought was going to be terribly hard, like biology. Don't get me wrong, I had some great influences, but during school hours educational motivation was almost non-existent from the school faculty and staff; I can count on one hand how many teachers showed that they actually cared about my academic present and future.
What happened to public educators expecting the best out of their students? When did pushing students, no matter what their socio-economic background was, go out the window? I literally see teachers chilling in their classrooms on their cell phones and guess what the students are doing? The students are doing the same thing. We could blame it on age, but I know a lot of young teachers who are trying to instill in students what was instilled in them. We could also try to blame it on things like "No Child Left Behind" (which I despise), but like I see some teachers working around the ridiculousness of NCLB. So who do we blame for limited expectations?
Parents - Yes, I'm blaming parents!!!!!! Parents should be the first people to express to their children the type of expectations that they have for their academic progress or lack there of. Parents should also make an EFFORT to get out to their children's school at least once a month, to meet with teachers and see what's really going on with their child's education.
Teachers/School Administration/School Boards - Yes, they get blamed too. Yes, education is a job, it is a means for providing a living for some, but you also have precious futures in your hands, futures that you have the ability to help mold. Why wouldn't you want to go above and beyond to help positively shape one of your student's futures? Yes, you work long hours (who doesn't). Yes, you have a family at home (again, who doesn't). Yes, the state and federal government require a lot out of you (you signed up for this). I believe if you're in education ( like myself), you should bend over backward making sure students get the best education and experience that you have to offer.
Students - Yes, I blame the students too. Stop making excuses. You can see what's right and what's wrong within the walls of your school. You see the "smart" kids getting their work done, getting awards, and you want the same feeling, but instead of asking how they do it, you want to tease them or ignore them - THAT'S NOT COOL. Ask for help, and if you're shy, ask for help after your friends have left. Get rid of some of those so called friends, you know what they're up too isn't going to help your future. I came from a home where my mother didn't make it to high school, so I had to choose: Be like those around me in my neighborhood or be like those who seemed to be going places? I mean I have a Master's Degree now, so what do you think I did?
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