This weekend I read an article about a young lady who was a high achiever at her boarding school in California. After graduating high school she enrolled at Columbia University and she became overwhelmed with the expectations of others thrust upon her, so after a couple semesters at school, she decided to quit and start all over again. The young lady stated that she was no longer inspired, therefore she took matters into her own hands and decided to live the life she wanted.
I'm sure you've heard of the phrase "Peer Pressure", where people
your age pressure you to do things that you normally wouldn't do; it's
not always dangerous, but it's almost never a good idea. Pressure to do
things that we normally wouldn't do doesn't always come from our peers,
for students who are considered high achievers, their pressure comes
from their parents. Additionally, there are some students who fall into
the average category, but their parents seem to think that the student
can do more, therefore they push those students to the limit, not
realizing the negative effect it's having on the student.
I often deal with parents who put extreme pressure on their high school students, not really focused on what the student wants or what the student thinks they can do, instead, it's almost like the parent is trying live through the student. As I interact with these types of parents my focus instantly goes to the student who is visibly and sometimes audibly upset that their parents are making them do extra work on top of the work they already have to do at the high school. On the one hand, I understand that the parents want their child to be successful, I applaud the efforts that these parents are making by being involved in the child's academics. On the other hand, parents have to listen to that child, especially if the student is saying that they can't live up to your expectations.
There is a balance that needs to be paid close attention to. If you push a student too hard while they are still in high school, once they graduate they may fall off the grid and live a life that is carefree. However, if you don't push a student enough, they may feel like being mediocre is OK, when really mediocrity can only get them so far in life. It all goes back to paying attention to the student. If a student has performed as an average student, doing just enough to get by, push them a little, but don't make them feel overwhelmed. Also, if you've allowed the student to perform at the average level in the beginning, don't expect much change from them in the end, unless the student is ready for change.
Parents, if you're going to push a student to perform at the highest level, make sure you start them early (i.e. elementary school); waiting until they reach high school to push them is setting yourself up for some resistance. Be sure to pay attention to what they're good at; if the student can excel in one area, push that area and introduce areas that need improvement along the way.
The key thing to remember here is that too much pressure from parents can cause students to explode once they break free from your grip.
Monday, May 30, 2016
Thursday, May 26, 2016
Teachers: You Are the ADULT
This is a public service announcement: Teachers STOP trying to pacify a student's every need.
I REPEAT: Teachers STOP IT.
Parents are doing it enough these days, giving their children everything they want and when the child can't have their way, they throw a tantrum.
Note to parents and teachers: Ms. Griffin will not tolerate that behavior.
Don't be afraid of students, their children, although the food today makes them grow at extremely alarming rates, they are still children and I will treat them as such.
What ever happened to students being told what to do and they did it?
I had a teacher named Ms. Lois Jones, when I came to class, that room belonged to her, not me or my classmates or my mama - it belonged to Ms. Jones. That's it, that's all.
Now-a-days, students run the show, at school and at home (say what?!), yes, it's either the student's way or the highway.
I was brought up in the old school, which means I like things done the old way. Students will RESPECK me, in fact I demand it. If I say no, after I've explained the situation, that's the end of the conversation - NEXT! If I say no and the student decides to go find somebody else to help their cause, they wasted their time and that person's time. A lot of new school teachers don't think this way and for the ones who do THANK YOU from the bottom of my heart.
Students need to understand how the "real world" works and the only place in the real world where you can have things your way is McDonald's *insert side eye*. I wish I might have tried to go over my military supervisor's head after he told me no, I would have found myself in the office of the commander watching him type my Letter of Counseling (LOC) (it's not good).
Students have this sense of entitlement, they have to have things their way, but if we allow them to keep this way of thinking they're going to go out into the world and get slapped in the face with some reality.
I REPEAT: Teachers STOP IT.
Parents are doing it enough these days, giving their children everything they want and when the child can't have their way, they throw a tantrum.
Note to parents and teachers: Ms. Griffin will not tolerate that behavior.
Don't be afraid of students, their children, although the food today makes them grow at extremely alarming rates, they are still children and I will treat them as such.
What ever happened to students being told what to do and they did it?
I had a teacher named Ms. Lois Jones, when I came to class, that room belonged to her, not me or my classmates or my mama - it belonged to Ms. Jones. That's it, that's all.
Now-a-days, students run the show, at school and at home (say what?!), yes, it's either the student's way or the highway.
I was brought up in the old school, which means I like things done the old way. Students will RESPECK me, in fact I demand it. If I say no, after I've explained the situation, that's the end of the conversation - NEXT! If I say no and the student decides to go find somebody else to help their cause, they wasted their time and that person's time. A lot of new school teachers don't think this way and for the ones who do THANK YOU from the bottom of my heart.
Students need to understand how the "real world" works and the only place in the real world where you can have things your way is McDonald's *insert side eye*. I wish I might have tried to go over my military supervisor's head after he told me no, I would have found myself in the office of the commander watching him type my Letter of Counseling (LOC) (it's not good).
Students have this sense of entitlement, they have to have things their way, but if we allow them to keep this way of thinking they're going to go out into the world and get slapped in the face with some reality.
Monday, May 23, 2016
There's No Excuse
I held an event about a month ago for parents of students who are eligible to take classes at the community college while simultaneously taking high school classes aka dual enrollment. Well, I would think that if I'm offering something free and that will benefit the future of your child, then anyone would show up right? Wrong, out of a possible 70 families that were invited to attend, only about 15 showed up. I was shocked! Here I am offering free college to students and families, but only a few showed up, but the show must go on and it did. I was immediately able to tell that the families who showed up were very serious about their child taking advantage of this wonderful opportunity. Now to be fair, the evening of the event it rained cats and dogs, but the rain ended an hour or so before my presentation took place and I waited for another 5 minutes after the advertised start time, just to give families a chance to come in, but the ones who were coming were already seated and patiently waiting for me to begin.
There is no excuse when it comes to planning for the future of your child. NONE. ZERO. ZILCH. My father didn't learn how to drive until I was in the 5th grade, at which point he bought a car (paid cash), and begin transporting my sister and I wherever we needed to go. However, before he had a car, he used his ability to walk and ride his bicycle to get from point A to point B; that included going to work, going out to eat, and leaving work to come check on myself due to any behavior issues that I might experience at school. My dad would ride his bicycle in the rain, in the humid, hot South Georgia summer, and in the cold; there was no where that he couldn't go, especially if it was pertaining to my sister and me. The car he purchased in 1997 was old and it often didn't work, so we would have to resort back to walking or doubling up on his bicycle (one of us on the handle bars and one on the seat with dad), but we made it work and there was never an acceptable excuse for why things couldn't or didn't get accomplished.
So what's your excuse?
If it's about your child, plan for their future, regardless of what you have going on, make every effort to support your child. Yes, there were times when my father couldn't leave work or my mother couldn't make it to an event, but they made arrangements for someone to show up in their place and relay the information back to them. In fact, because teachers were so awesome, they would come to events and report them back to parents, because they cared.
There's no excuse. As my husband would say, "Are you going to BBQ or mildew?".
There is no excuse when it comes to planning for the future of your child. NONE. ZERO. ZILCH. My father didn't learn how to drive until I was in the 5th grade, at which point he bought a car (paid cash), and begin transporting my sister and I wherever we needed to go. However, before he had a car, he used his ability to walk and ride his bicycle to get from point A to point B; that included going to work, going out to eat, and leaving work to come check on myself due to any behavior issues that I might experience at school. My dad would ride his bicycle in the rain, in the humid, hot South Georgia summer, and in the cold; there was no where that he couldn't go, especially if it was pertaining to my sister and me. The car he purchased in 1997 was old and it often didn't work, so we would have to resort back to walking or doubling up on his bicycle (one of us on the handle bars and one on the seat with dad), but we made it work and there was never an acceptable excuse for why things couldn't or didn't get accomplished.
So what's your excuse?
If it's about your child, plan for their future, regardless of what you have going on, make every effort to support your child. Yes, there were times when my father couldn't leave work or my mother couldn't make it to an event, but they made arrangements for someone to show up in their place and relay the information back to them. In fact, because teachers were so awesome, they would come to events and report them back to parents, because they cared.
There's no excuse. As my husband would say, "Are you going to BBQ or mildew?".
Thursday, May 19, 2016
No Students in the Library (Media Center)
What happened to the media center being filled with students doing research projects?
I work at two high schools, twice a week and every week I pass by the media center and there are no, ZERO, students in there reading or even touching a book, although there are several books to choose from.
What happened to the days of the teacher giving her students a project or a book report and making them spend the entire period in the library, researching the material they will use for that project? I understand that everything is online now, but why have a library if you aren't going make the students utilize it or allow them to utilize it. The media center has become somewhat of a dead zone for students, nothing goes on here, so they stay away.
Someone could argue that students can find what they need online, but are students really reading anything anyway? Whether it be online or in a book, I find that students aren't taking the time to read anything, so maybe we need to make them READ.
Reading is fundamental. Reading something could be the difference of you gaining something or signing your life away. I can't completely harp on the students, parents aren't reading either, what is going on with the world?! I remember my teachers making us read, and re-read a paragraph until we could fully understand and explain what we had read; that doesn't seem to be happening anymore. Everything is geared towards preparing students for a test, yet test scores don't seem to be increasing.
My solution is that we get students from in front of the computer screen and into the library. Make them grab a book and put down their cell phones. Have them read about whatever they choose or pick something for the subject you teach and have them report on what they read. Make their brains actually do some work.
Put the library to use or else, cut the costs and put the money elsewhere.
I work at two high schools, twice a week and every week I pass by the media center and there are no, ZERO, students in there reading or even touching a book, although there are several books to choose from.
What happened to the days of the teacher giving her students a project or a book report and making them spend the entire period in the library, researching the material they will use for that project? I understand that everything is online now, but why have a library if you aren't going make the students utilize it or allow them to utilize it. The media center has become somewhat of a dead zone for students, nothing goes on here, so they stay away.
Someone could argue that students can find what they need online, but are students really reading anything anyway? Whether it be online or in a book, I find that students aren't taking the time to read anything, so maybe we need to make them READ.
Reading is fundamental. Reading something could be the difference of you gaining something or signing your life away. I can't completely harp on the students, parents aren't reading either, what is going on with the world?! I remember my teachers making us read, and re-read a paragraph until we could fully understand and explain what we had read; that doesn't seem to be happening anymore. Everything is geared towards preparing students for a test, yet test scores don't seem to be increasing.
My solution is that we get students from in front of the computer screen and into the library. Make them grab a book and put down their cell phones. Have them read about whatever they choose or pick something for the subject you teach and have them report on what they read. Make their brains actually do some work.
Put the library to use or else, cut the costs and put the money elsewhere.
Wednesday, May 18, 2016
Are The Adults Paying Attention?
I have a very serious question, "Are the adults paying attention to what's going on in the child's education?".
I send emails quite often, in fact, if you can't reach me in my office, you can always reach me by email and I'm usually quick about responding except for when the answer you require also requires some research. I also send letters home in the mail, very detailed letters explaining why I'm writing and how it will be beneficial to the student of that household, but no one really pays attention. Here I am, offering a FREE........F-R-E-E college education to students in a low income situation and no one is paying attention. The students are paying attention, but their attention span is limited, they have other things to be concerned with, rightfully so because they're children, but what about the adults?
The only time people seem to pay attention is when something is wrong and isn't that sad? Or, they pay attention when they realize that the student isn't getting what another student is getting. Or, they just don't have enough time to pay attention because they have other things to worry about, but isn't the FREE college education of your child important enough?
Now, don't get me wrong, I have a handful of parents who really, and I mean REALLY care about their child's education. There are also a handful of teachers who genuinely care about the students they serve (Yes, teachers, your job is to serve your students education - you are in a public service position), but the majority of adults are NOT paying attention and because they aren't paying attention, students miss out.
I need adults to read the emails that are sent to them concerning their students, their children. I need adults to listen to everything that I tell them about FREE college! I need adults to read the program material so that they can understand what their student is signing up for. I need adults to read and listen to everything I have to say that they can ask QUESTIONS NOW, not after it's too late.
Ultimately, I need adults to care enough to want to make a difference in the lives of their students, their children, because it really does take a village.
I send emails quite often, in fact, if you can't reach me in my office, you can always reach me by email and I'm usually quick about responding except for when the answer you require also requires some research. I also send letters home in the mail, very detailed letters explaining why I'm writing and how it will be beneficial to the student of that household, but no one really pays attention. Here I am, offering a FREE........F-R-E-E college education to students in a low income situation and no one is paying attention. The students are paying attention, but their attention span is limited, they have other things to be concerned with, rightfully so because they're children, but what about the adults?
The only time people seem to pay attention is when something is wrong and isn't that sad? Or, they pay attention when they realize that the student isn't getting what another student is getting. Or, they just don't have enough time to pay attention because they have other things to worry about, but isn't the FREE college education of your child important enough?
Now, don't get me wrong, I have a handful of parents who really, and I mean REALLY care about their child's education. There are also a handful of teachers who genuinely care about the students they serve (Yes, teachers, your job is to serve your students education - you are in a public service position), but the majority of adults are NOT paying attention and because they aren't paying attention, students miss out.
I need adults to read the emails that are sent to them concerning their students, their children. I need adults to listen to everything that I tell them about FREE college! I need adults to read the program material so that they can understand what their student is signing up for. I need adults to read and listen to everything I have to say that they can ask QUESTIONS NOW, not after it's too late.
Ultimately, I need adults to care enough to want to make a difference in the lives of their students, their children, because it really does take a village.
Saturday, May 14, 2016
Limited Expectations
"I can already tell what they're going to be", said one of the school employees. I said, "Really, how?". She said, "I just can. You can just look at them and tell". I was shocked.
Teachers and school staff have so much power, so much influence over the next generation, but instead of being a solution to the problem they talk down to the students and only lend a helping hand to those whose family they know or whose parents make the most fuss; everyone else just falls to the wayside.
I remember being in the 9th and 10th grade, at a high school in South Georgia, and not really understanding or caring about what was going on with my education. I took the classes that the school told me I should take, without question, unless it was a class that I thought was going to be terribly hard, like biology. Don't get me wrong, I had some great influences, but during school hours educational motivation was almost non-existent from the school faculty and staff; I can count on one hand how many teachers showed that they actually cared about my academic present and future.
What happened to public educators expecting the best out of their students? When did pushing students, no matter what their socio-economic background was, go out the window? I literally see teachers chilling in their classrooms on their cell phones and guess what the students are doing? The students are doing the same thing. We could blame it on age, but I know a lot of young teachers who are trying to instill in students what was instilled in them. We could also try to blame it on things like "No Child Left Behind" (which I despise), but like I see some teachers working around the ridiculousness of NCLB. So who do we blame for limited expectations?
Parents - Yes, I'm blaming parents!!!!!! Parents should be the first people to express to their children the type of expectations that they have for their academic progress or lack there of. Parents should also make an EFFORT to get out to their children's school at least once a month, to meet with teachers and see what's really going on with their child's education.
Teachers/School Administration/School Boards - Yes, they get blamed too. Yes, education is a job, it is a means for providing a living for some, but you also have precious futures in your hands, futures that you have the ability to help mold. Why wouldn't you want to go above and beyond to help positively shape one of your student's futures? Yes, you work long hours (who doesn't). Yes, you have a family at home (again, who doesn't). Yes, the state and federal government require a lot out of you (you signed up for this). I believe if you're in education ( like myself), you should bend over backward making sure students get the best education and experience that you have to offer.
Students - Yes, I blame the students too. Stop making excuses. You can see what's right and what's wrong within the walls of your school. You see the "smart" kids getting their work done, getting awards, and you want the same feeling, but instead of asking how they do it, you want to tease them or ignore them - THAT'S NOT COOL. Ask for help, and if you're shy, ask for help after your friends have left. Get rid of some of those so called friends, you know what they're up too isn't going to help your future. I came from a home where my mother didn't make it to high school, so I had to choose: Be like those around me in my neighborhood or be like those who seemed to be going places? I mean I have a Master's Degree now, so what do you think I did?
Teachers and school staff have so much power, so much influence over the next generation, but instead of being a solution to the problem they talk down to the students and only lend a helping hand to those whose family they know or whose parents make the most fuss; everyone else just falls to the wayside.
I remember being in the 9th and 10th grade, at a high school in South Georgia, and not really understanding or caring about what was going on with my education. I took the classes that the school told me I should take, without question, unless it was a class that I thought was going to be terribly hard, like biology. Don't get me wrong, I had some great influences, but during school hours educational motivation was almost non-existent from the school faculty and staff; I can count on one hand how many teachers showed that they actually cared about my academic present and future.
What happened to public educators expecting the best out of their students? When did pushing students, no matter what their socio-economic background was, go out the window? I literally see teachers chilling in their classrooms on their cell phones and guess what the students are doing? The students are doing the same thing. We could blame it on age, but I know a lot of young teachers who are trying to instill in students what was instilled in them. We could also try to blame it on things like "No Child Left Behind" (which I despise), but like I see some teachers working around the ridiculousness of NCLB. So who do we blame for limited expectations?
Parents - Yes, I'm blaming parents!!!!!! Parents should be the first people to express to their children the type of expectations that they have for their academic progress or lack there of. Parents should also make an EFFORT to get out to their children's school at least once a month, to meet with teachers and see what's really going on with their child's education.
Teachers/School Administration/School Boards - Yes, they get blamed too. Yes, education is a job, it is a means for providing a living for some, but you also have precious futures in your hands, futures that you have the ability to help mold. Why wouldn't you want to go above and beyond to help positively shape one of your student's futures? Yes, you work long hours (who doesn't). Yes, you have a family at home (again, who doesn't). Yes, the state and federal government require a lot out of you (you signed up for this). I believe if you're in education ( like myself), you should bend over backward making sure students get the best education and experience that you have to offer.
Students - Yes, I blame the students too. Stop making excuses. You can see what's right and what's wrong within the walls of your school. You see the "smart" kids getting their work done, getting awards, and you want the same feeling, but instead of asking how they do it, you want to tease them or ignore them - THAT'S NOT COOL. Ask for help, and if you're shy, ask for help after your friends have left. Get rid of some of those so called friends, you know what they're up too isn't going to help your future. I came from a home where my mother didn't make it to high school, so I had to choose: Be like those around me in my neighborhood or be like those who seemed to be going places? I mean I have a Master's Degree now, so what do you think I did?
Wednesday, May 11, 2016
No School Spirit
What happened to school spirit?!!!!!!
Yesterday I sat up a photo-shoot for the participants in my program. My supervisor had created a new brochure for us to use for recruiting purposes and he wanted to use images of my students instead of stock photos. I contacted my students for about a week and a half, reminding them of the photo-shoot and how awesome it would be to leave their legacy in the county and to be seen all over the state, but most of the students could care less. Needless to say, I was disappointed. I was able to get them to participate, but this photo-shoot was so awkward. The students had no enthusiasm, no get up and go, and the ones who did were few in numbers. It was like pulling teeth to get them to have fun with the shoot.
If this type of thing was happening at either of the two high schools that I attended 10 to 14 years ago, all of my friends would have jumped on this opportunity. We enjoyed having fun together, even though we all hung in different cliques. We would have already figured out what outfits we were going to wear and our poses would have already been practiced. I literally had to tell my students how to smile, how to stand, where to look at. It was so bad that when they were asked to do a silly pose they asked me what to do. *Mouth FELL to the floor*
Have schools gotten this boring? Have students lost interest in having fun at school? From what I can see, the answer to my questions is YES! Pep rallies aren't the same in anymore! I can't imagine going to a pep rally and not TURNING ALL THE WAY UP!!!! Pep rallies were so fun you would leave out of the gym sweating as if you had just come off of the dance floor. These students aren't excited like that today. They're on their cell phones, looking down and not paying attention to the world around them. Teachers are teaching to the test in an effort to boost test scores (NOT WORKING BTW), so that they can save their jobs. School administration seem to lurk in the shadows, trying to avoid parents who think that these schools are the equivalent to Burger King, and most of the time they do get to have it their way.
I'm a product of public schooling and I would like for my future children to attend public school and enjoy it the way that I did, but if I keep seeing what I see here, we're sending our kids elsewhere.
Yesterday I sat up a photo-shoot for the participants in my program. My supervisor had created a new brochure for us to use for recruiting purposes and he wanted to use images of my students instead of stock photos. I contacted my students for about a week and a half, reminding them of the photo-shoot and how awesome it would be to leave their legacy in the county and to be seen all over the state, but most of the students could care less. Needless to say, I was disappointed. I was able to get them to participate, but this photo-shoot was so awkward. The students had no enthusiasm, no get up and go, and the ones who did were few in numbers. It was like pulling teeth to get them to have fun with the shoot.
If this type of thing was happening at either of the two high schools that I attended 10 to 14 years ago, all of my friends would have jumped on this opportunity. We enjoyed having fun together, even though we all hung in different cliques. We would have already figured out what outfits we were going to wear and our poses would have already been practiced. I literally had to tell my students how to smile, how to stand, where to look at. It was so bad that when they were asked to do a silly pose they asked me what to do. *Mouth FELL to the floor*
Have schools gotten this boring? Have students lost interest in having fun at school? From what I can see, the answer to my questions is YES! Pep rallies aren't the same in anymore! I can't imagine going to a pep rally and not TURNING ALL THE WAY UP!!!! Pep rallies were so fun you would leave out of the gym sweating as if you had just come off of the dance floor. These students aren't excited like that today. They're on their cell phones, looking down and not paying attention to the world around them. Teachers are teaching to the test in an effort to boost test scores (NOT WORKING BTW), so that they can save their jobs. School administration seem to lurk in the shadows, trying to avoid parents who think that these schools are the equivalent to Burger King, and most of the time they do get to have it their way.
I'm a product of public schooling and I would like for my future children to attend public school and enjoy it the way that I did, but if I keep seeing what I see here, we're sending our kids elsewhere.
Monday, May 9, 2016
Exposing Students to Opportunity
I was speaking with a colleague of mine this morning and she was asking me about the military and if I would speak with her son about joining, but guess what grade her son is in? He's in the 9th grade! She has already began to place her son into different programs to get him exposed to the limitless opportunities that available to him and I applaud her for that, because unfortunately, there are not enough parents doing this for their children.
When I was grade school age, my mother and father (not married) made sure that my sister and I were enrolled in programs that would keep us active, for instance, one summer we did swim lessons. Another summer we were enrolled in a summer camp that required us to arrive by 8 AM and we would stay until about 12 or 1 PM. During those few hours we would have the best time any elementary school kid could dream of. We would have breakfast, go outside and play on the equipment, getting sweaty and smelly; then we'd eat lunch, maybe do arts and crafts, maybe go swimming and maybe even go bowling or to the movies, but that was all we did. We had tons of fun and made many childhood friends, but we weren't exposed to things that would help to prepare us for our future. So as I grew up I remained heavily involved in various activities, because that was something that was instilled in me and I liked it, no matter what it was, but I was limited and I didn't even know it.
I played sports (soccer, cheerleading and track), I was in various clubs, I did Air Force JROTC for 4 years, but I never thought to do anything that would give me insight on what I could do or be in the future (other than sports). There were a lot of reasons for this: my mother wasn't exposed to potential career opportunities, my father wasn't exposed, many people in my family weren't exposed, teachers had limited exposure and maybe even limited expectations for the future; not that they wanted us to fail, but their goal was to train us for the next grade and to prepare us on how to be good citizens.
When I go speak to students I ask them similar questions that I was asked when I was younger: "What do you want to be? Why do you want to be that?", but I also ask them this, "What are you doing now to prepare yourself to be what you want to be?". Most students have NEVER been asked this question before, often times students ask me, "What do you mean what am I doing to prepare myself?". Students don't automatically know that they can begin volunteering in the summer or researching summer camps, they really think and believe that they don't need to begin preparing for their future until senior year! I thought the same thing when I was their age and that is because no one had exposed me to different opportunities. I was different though, I was and still am a "go-getter"; if I want to do something I do it, I research it, I save for it and I do it, but I'm almost 30, I've experienced some things, kids in high school, kids IN GENERAL don't know to do these things unless we help to expose them.
My job is only to identify students who are eligible for enrollment into my program, I advise them, register them for their classes and monitor their progress throughout the semester, then REPEAT. However, I do so much more. I recognize that students don't know about the opportunities that are available to them, so I go Above and Beyond, and I find different things for them and let them know about the things they need to do to become what they hope to be.
When I was grade school age, my mother and father (not married) made sure that my sister and I were enrolled in programs that would keep us active, for instance, one summer we did swim lessons. Another summer we were enrolled in a summer camp that required us to arrive by 8 AM and we would stay until about 12 or 1 PM. During those few hours we would have the best time any elementary school kid could dream of. We would have breakfast, go outside and play on the equipment, getting sweaty and smelly; then we'd eat lunch, maybe do arts and crafts, maybe go swimming and maybe even go bowling or to the movies, but that was all we did. We had tons of fun and made many childhood friends, but we weren't exposed to things that would help to prepare us for our future. So as I grew up I remained heavily involved in various activities, because that was something that was instilled in me and I liked it, no matter what it was, but I was limited and I didn't even know it.
I played sports (soccer, cheerleading and track), I was in various clubs, I did Air Force JROTC for 4 years, but I never thought to do anything that would give me insight on what I could do or be in the future (other than sports). There were a lot of reasons for this: my mother wasn't exposed to potential career opportunities, my father wasn't exposed, many people in my family weren't exposed, teachers had limited exposure and maybe even limited expectations for the future; not that they wanted us to fail, but their goal was to train us for the next grade and to prepare us on how to be good citizens.
When I go speak to students I ask them similar questions that I was asked when I was younger: "What do you want to be? Why do you want to be that?", but I also ask them this, "What are you doing now to prepare yourself to be what you want to be?". Most students have NEVER been asked this question before, often times students ask me, "What do you mean what am I doing to prepare myself?". Students don't automatically know that they can begin volunteering in the summer or researching summer camps, they really think and believe that they don't need to begin preparing for their future until senior year! I thought the same thing when I was their age and that is because no one had exposed me to different opportunities. I was different though, I was and still am a "go-getter"; if I want to do something I do it, I research it, I save for it and I do it, but I'm almost 30, I've experienced some things, kids in high school, kids IN GENERAL don't know to do these things unless we help to expose them.
My job is only to identify students who are eligible for enrollment into my program, I advise them, register them for their classes and monitor their progress throughout the semester, then REPEAT. However, I do so much more. I recognize that students don't know about the opportunities that are available to them, so I go Above and Beyond, and I find different things for them and let them know about the things they need to do to become what they hope to be.
Friday, May 6, 2016
Students: Getting to Know Them
How I came about being asked to speak to a group of 8th graders was simple: I emailed all of the local middle school principals in the county that I work in and expressed how I would like to come speak to their 8th graders about their future. Of about 6 middle schools only 2 schools responded to my email and 1 of the 2 actually invited me to come and address their 8th graders. I was so excited because I was going to be able to go in and get to connect with these students, but what I wasn't prepared for was the attitude that the school staff showed for the students. The only person who truly seemed to care about these students was their guidance counselor, hence the reason she invited me. There were about 4 other school staff attending my presentation and only 3 of those (including an assistant principal) really cared about what I was saying and cared that their students listened.
The main purpose of me meeting and speaking to this group of 8th graders was to talk to them about college, but see what I've learned about students is that if they don't think you care about them they ain't gonna listen. So when I went in I examined the group of students before me and I made sure to make eye contact with each and every one of them, which made them understandably uncomfortable. I like to make eye contact with them so that they can see that I'm really serious and that I'm really just here to get to know you and help you. After the counselor introduced me (she called me Mrs. Green, but anyway LOL) I took the floor and greeted the students who were surprisingly responsive! I told them my rules for when I'm speaking to them and then I went into my story about my time in middle school and how I visited ISS SEVERAL times. I also told them about the time that I tried stealing from Walmart in the 7th grade, as well as the time that I got kicked off of the cheerleading squad because I had one too many referrals. I had their attention, but I already knew this. Students need leadership and they need guidance, but they also need to feel like you understand where they are coming from. I'll have to admit that I wasn't really sure how I was going to get to them, but God helped me out the day before.
The day before I happened to be at one of the high schools that I work at once a week and this same group of 8th graders was there participating in a campus tour. One thing that I like about this county is that they allow all 8th graders to come and tour each high school, as well as get acquainted with the clubs and teams that they have to offer. So I'm watching the students and one of the school staff says, "It's a shame, but I already know what they're going to be". I said, "Really, how is that?". She says, "I can just look at them, you can just look at them and tell who's going to do what once they get here". I disagreed, I said, "I have no idea how they're gonna be, but I'm going to get to know them.".
It's important for me to get to know that students I'm speaking with because I want to help them understand that not so long ago I was sitting exactly where they are (just in a different state). I eventually got around to talking about the program that I run and how beneficial it is going to be for their future, but first they needed to know that no matter what they've done up until this point, they can still be whatever they hope to be. I think that schools theses days are only concerned with numbers, test scores, school grades, keeping their job, performing well, but they're missing the one key reason they're in the profession: the STUDENTS.
The main purpose of me meeting and speaking to this group of 8th graders was to talk to them about college, but see what I've learned about students is that if they don't think you care about them they ain't gonna listen. So when I went in I examined the group of students before me and I made sure to make eye contact with each and every one of them, which made them understandably uncomfortable. I like to make eye contact with them so that they can see that I'm really serious and that I'm really just here to get to know you and help you. After the counselor introduced me (she called me Mrs. Green, but anyway LOL) I took the floor and greeted the students who were surprisingly responsive! I told them my rules for when I'm speaking to them and then I went into my story about my time in middle school and how I visited ISS SEVERAL times. I also told them about the time that I tried stealing from Walmart in the 7th grade, as well as the time that I got kicked off of the cheerleading squad because I had one too many referrals. I had their attention, but I already knew this. Students need leadership and they need guidance, but they also need to feel like you understand where they are coming from. I'll have to admit that I wasn't really sure how I was going to get to them, but God helped me out the day before.
The day before I happened to be at one of the high schools that I work at once a week and this same group of 8th graders was there participating in a campus tour. One thing that I like about this county is that they allow all 8th graders to come and tour each high school, as well as get acquainted with the clubs and teams that they have to offer. So I'm watching the students and one of the school staff says, "It's a shame, but I already know what they're going to be". I said, "Really, how is that?". She says, "I can just look at them, you can just look at them and tell who's going to do what once they get here". I disagreed, I said, "I have no idea how they're gonna be, but I'm going to get to know them.".
It's important for me to get to know that students I'm speaking with because I want to help them understand that not so long ago I was sitting exactly where they are (just in a different state). I eventually got around to talking about the program that I run and how beneficial it is going to be for their future, but first they needed to know that no matter what they've done up until this point, they can still be whatever they hope to be. I think that schools theses days are only concerned with numbers, test scores, school grades, keeping their job, performing well, but they're missing the one key reason they're in the profession: the STUDENTS.
Wednesday, May 4, 2016
Youth Are Misunderstood
"They've never been this quiet before", said a guidance counselor from one of the local schools in the county I work in. "Really? Wow!", I said, before trying to find a good reason why, but I already knew the answer, when I come into the classroom (or lunchroom) I DEMAND their undivided attention.
Somehow (GOD) I landed into the world of advising, more specifically advising in higher education and I love it! I owe my love of education and progression to my parents. My father ALWAYS preached education, he would say, "Cierra, education is all you need to worry about. Don't worry about boys, they'll get you no where." I had a pretty smart mouth so I would respond by saying, "But dad you were a boy once, so did you get mom to go no where with you?" My mother didn't push education as hard or intense as my father did, but she did lay down the law, so if we didn't take our @$$ to school, then we couldn't live under her roof. Then there was my super smart sister who didn't realize that I was always competing with her, but by the time I hit middle school I gave up that dream, but she kept me motivated, especially when other family members were giving her praise for her great grades and I was sitting in the back looking like a chump (I love you Bran). Then of course, there were so many other adults in my life pushing me towards education because they didn't have anyone to push them as hard, therefore I thank GOD for these people, who indirectly helped me get where I am today.
Back to these middle school students.
I was shocked to hear the school administration say that no one had been able to get the attention of these students like I had. That's scary right? But what's even more scary is that a majority of the school administration that I saw were people of color, and so were a majority of the students!!!!!!! I'm trying to wrap my brain around this thing folks! It's baffling that people who are in a position of authority are unable to get thru to these students, what's even more baffling is that people of color who are in a position of power aren't getting thru to these students. I know I titled this blog post "Youth Are Misunderstood", but now I'm thinking school administration just doesn't care or maybe they care, but the power of that pretty coin or lack thereof is overwhelming. Yikes!
I say that the youth are misunderstood, because somewhere along the way adults have allowed the following thinking to settle in their tiny brains:
"Kids don't want an overbearing figure to look up too, they want a friend." - Correction, like my momma would say, "I'm the parent and you're the child." or "I'm not your friend, I'm your mother." or "Oh you grown now? Well take your grown @$$ out of my house and get a grown job!" Sure, kids don't want to be told what to do, they think they're grown, but their kids, they think alot of things as they're growing up, but if you're the adult, it is your responsibility to teach them right from wrong. Teach them some RESPECK!
Somehow (GOD) I landed into the world of advising, more specifically advising in higher education and I love it! I owe my love of education and progression to my parents. My father ALWAYS preached education, he would say, "Cierra, education is all you need to worry about. Don't worry about boys, they'll get you no where." I had a pretty smart mouth so I would respond by saying, "But dad you were a boy once, so did you get mom to go no where with you?" My mother didn't push education as hard or intense as my father did, but she did lay down the law, so if we didn't take our @$$ to school, then we couldn't live under her roof. Then there was my super smart sister who didn't realize that I was always competing with her, but by the time I hit middle school I gave up that dream, but she kept me motivated, especially when other family members were giving her praise for her great grades and I was sitting in the back looking like a chump (I love you Bran). Then of course, there were so many other adults in my life pushing me towards education because they didn't have anyone to push them as hard, therefore I thank GOD for these people, who indirectly helped me get where I am today.
Back to these middle school students.
I was shocked to hear the school administration say that no one had been able to get the attention of these students like I had. That's scary right? But what's even more scary is that a majority of the school administration that I saw were people of color, and so were a majority of the students!!!!!!! I'm trying to wrap my brain around this thing folks! It's baffling that people who are in a position of authority are unable to get thru to these students, what's even more baffling is that people of color who are in a position of power aren't getting thru to these students. I know I titled this blog post "Youth Are Misunderstood", but now I'm thinking school administration just doesn't care or maybe they care, but the power of that pretty coin or lack thereof is overwhelming. Yikes!
I say that the youth are misunderstood, because somewhere along the way adults have allowed the following thinking to settle in their tiny brains:
"Kids don't want an overbearing figure to look up too, they want a friend." - Correction, like my momma would say, "I'm the parent and you're the child." or "I'm not your friend, I'm your mother." or "Oh you grown now? Well take your grown @$$ out of my house and get a grown job!" Sure, kids don't want to be told what to do, they think they're grown, but their kids, they think alot of things as they're growing up, but if you're the adult, it is your responsibility to teach them right from wrong. Teach them some RESPECK!
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